A woman is questioning whether she was wrong for kicking her sister's boyfriend out of her vacation home. In a detailed account, she explains the events that led up to her decision and the aftermath, including family backlash and strained relationships.

My husband Ky and I own a vacation home on Lake Michigan. It was his before we got married, although we both technically own it now (this becomes relevant later). My sister Lia has been using our vacation home since Ky and I started dating, and we don't mind. She is always clean and courteous and leaves it better than she found it. However, she started dating her boyfriend Al about a year ago, and I can't say the same for him.
Al is a total slob. He leaves dirty dishes, empty bottles, and other messes everywhere, expecting Lia to clean up. He has joint custody of two young kids from his previous relationship, and he just lets them run free, expecting Lia to do the work even though they are his kids. On top of that, he has told Lia to get him a beer while she's busy and he's watching TV a few times in front of Ky and me, so I can't imagine how he treats her when we are not around. Their house is always a mess because Lia works 60 hours a week and doesn't have the time to take care of two small kids and Al, clean, and work long hours. Yet somehow, I think Lia really loves Al. She looks at him like he is the only man in the world. When she talks about him, her eyes light up and her voice is sweet and melodic.
That's why when Lia asked if she and Al could use the vacation home this week, I said yes. I figured what's the worst that could happen. Plus, Ky and I already planned on going three days after them, so we'd overlap.
When Ky and I got there, the vacation house was a pigsty. It smelled like rotting food. There was a mountain of dirty dishes in the sink, the floor was sticky, and there were crayon drawings on the walls. We got to the living room, where, lo and behold, Lia was scrambling to pick up toys, and Al was drinking a beer in a rocking chair. I immediately snatched the beer from his hand and asked why he wasn't cleaning the mess he made. He asked why I assumed it was him and not Lia. I said it's because I'm not an idiot. He just chuckled and said Lia was doing the cleaning, and there didn't need to be two people cleaning. His nonchalance really ticked me off, so I told him he and his sticky kids had an hour to pack up their things and leave before I called the cops. Al looked at Ky, and Ky was like, "What are you looking at me for? Go pack!"
At this point, Lia was really upset with me. She said they were looking forward to unwinding and I walked in and ruined it in 5 minutes, not even considering other resolutions to the conflict. Plus, she said I had no claim to the house since I didn't buy it myself. I told her there is no conflict—Al is deadweight and that's that. And as for the house, Ky "owns" it, and he was with me. She said if Al was leaving, she was leaving too. That night, I got a call from my mom asking why I kicked Lia out. I told her I kicked Al out, and Lia followed. My mom told me I need to be more accepting of new members of the family and that not everyone has the same living style as me. Now she’s mad, and Lia won't talk to me. Was I wrong in this situation?

The overwhelming sentiment among the reactions is that the author was justified in kicking out her sister's boyfriend, Al. Most judgments agree that Al's disrespectful and lazy behavior was unacceptable, and they sympathize with the author's frustration. Commenters heavily criticized Al for expecting Lia to clean up after him and his children and for allowing his kids to draw on the walls and make a mess. They also noted that while it is unfortunate that Lia is in a relationship with someone who treats her poorly, the author has every right to maintain the cleanliness and respect of her own property. Many people suggested that the issue with the mother and sister's reaction is likely due to a lack of understanding of how bad the situation was, with some recommending that the author should have documented the mess to show them. Overall, the general sentiment supports the author's decision while expressing concern for Lia's well-being in her relationship with Al.

The top reactions not only sided with the author's actions but also provided advice on handling the situation moving forward. One reaction emphasized that Al’s behavior should continue to be called out as unacceptable, but advised to focus solely on his actions rather than criticizing Lia's choice in a partner. This responder suggested that the author should consistently point out Al's laziness and irresponsibility with comments like, “Are your legs and arms broken?” when he asks Lia to get him a beer or “Pick up after your kids” when he does not look after his children.

Another top response criticized the sister for escalating the situation to the family and noted the inappropriateness of involving their mother. This person highlighted that allowing children to draw on someone else's walls and leaving a home in disarray is not simply a different "living style," but a blatant disrespect for someone else's property. This commenter stated that the author's home is not a daycare and concluded with, “Your home, your decision.”

The third prominent reaction provided a blend of sympathy and staunch support for the author's decision. This responder acknowledged that everyone may have been in relationships where they could not see the flaws in their partner, but emphasized that treating someone else's property with disrespect crosses a line. They bluntly stated, “Get out, loser,” in response to Al’s behavior, solidifying the consensus that Al’s conduct was beyond tolerable.

In conclusion, the author's decision to kick her sister's boyfriend out of the vacation home has garnered significant support and understanding from the community. Commenters largely agree that Al's lack of respect for the property and for Lia was unacceptable, and they commend the author and Ky for taking a stand. Many also express hope that Lia will come to recognize Al's negative influence and ultimately make a change for the better. It is clear that while family dynamics can be complicated, maintaining respect and boundaries is essential, especially when it comes to protecting one's home and loved ones.